Live The Life Of Your Dreams

100 Funny Motivational Quotes

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Funny Motivational Quotes

1. “I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.”
2. “If at first, you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.”
3. “I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.”
4. “The road to success is always under construction.”
5. “The only way to do great work is to love what you do. Or to get paid a lot for it.”
6. “I’m not clumsy, the floor just hates me.”
7. “Change is not a four-letter word…but often your reaction to it is!”
8. “If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”
9. “I don’t need anger management, I need people to stop pissing me off.”
10. “I may be old, but at least I got to see all the good bands.”
11. “If you can’t convince them, confuse them.”
12. “The best things in life are actually really expensive.”
13. “I’m not crazy, my reality is just different from yours.”
14. “I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.”
15. “Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.”
16. “I’m not short, I’m concentrated awesome.”
17. “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.”
18. “Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.”
19. “I don’t need a hairstylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.”
20. “I don’t have a beer belly, I have a protective covering for my rock-hard abs.”
21. “I may be fat, but I’m not as fat as I’m going to be.”
22. “I don’t need a personal trainer, I need someone to follow me around and slap unhealthy food out of my hand.”
23. “If there’s a will, there are five hundred relatives.”
24. “I’m not funny, I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.”
25. “I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you.”
26. “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.”
27. “The trouble with trouble is it starts out as fun.”
28. “I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.”
29. “I’m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them.”
30. “I’m not here to judge, I’m just pointing out all the mistakes you’re making.”
31. “I’m great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.”
32. “Teamwork is important; it helps to put the blame on someone else.”
33. “I’m not saying I hate you, but I’d unplug your life support to charge my phone.”
34. “I’m not lazy, I’m just highly motivated to do nothing.”
35. “I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.”
36. “I’m not shy, I’m just holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.”
37. “I’m not a nerd, I’m just smarter than you.”
38. “I don’t have a dirty mind, I have a sexy imagination.”
39. “I’m not clumsy, I’m just on a mission to test gravity.”
40. “I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.”
41. “I’m not a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that?”
42. “I’m not a morning person, don’t pull my covers off.”
43. “I’m not weird, I’m limited edition.”
44. “I’m not short, I’m fun-sized.”
45. “I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.”
46. “I’m not saying I’m Batman, but have you ever seen us in the same room together?”
47. “I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode.”
48. “I’m not clumsy, I’m just dancing with the floor.”
49. “I’m not a shopaholic, I’m just helping the economy.”
50. “I’m not saying I’m perfect, but I’m pretty close.”
51. “I’m not a troublemaker, I’m just a master of disaster.”
52. “I’m not a procrastinator; I’m just extremely productive at unimportant things.”
53. “I’m not a philosopher, I’m just a guy who overthinks everything.”
54. “I’m not a quitter, I’m just conserving my energy.”
55. “I’m not a morning person, I’m a coffee person.”
56. “I’m not a pessimist, I’m just an experienced optimist.”
57. “I’m not a doctor, but I can make you feel better.”
58. “I’m not an early bird or a night owl, I’m a permanently exhausted pigeon.”
59. “I’m not a troublemaker, I’m just skilled at detecting loopholes.”
60. “I’m not saying I’m Batman, but have you ever seen us together in a room?”
61. “I’m not a perfectionist, I just strive for excellence in all areas of laziness.”
62. “I’m not a nerd, I’m just smarter than most people.”
63. “I’m not always late, but when I am, I make it a grand entrance.”
64. “I’m not a gossip, but I do like to observe and report.”
65. “I’m not a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that?”
66. “I’m not a morning person, don’t pull my covers off.”
67. “I’m not weird, I’m limited edition.”
68. “I’m not short, I’m fun-sized.”
69. “I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.”
70. “I’m not saying I’m Batman, but have you ever seen us in the same room together?”
71. “I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode.”
72. “I’m not clumsy, I’m just dancing with the floor.”
73. “I’m not a shopaholic, I’m just helping the economy.”
74. “I’m not saying I’m perfect, but I’m pretty close.”
75. “I’m not a troublemaker, I’m just a master of disaster.”
76. “I’m not a procrastinator; I’m just extremely productive at unimportant things.”
77. “I’m not a philosopher, I’m just a guy who overthinks everything.”
78. “I’m not a quitter, I’m just conserving my energy.”
79. “I’m not a morning person, I’m a coffee person.”
80. “I’m not a pessimist, I’m just an experienced optimist.”
81. “I’m not a doctor, but I can make you feel better.”
82. “I’m not an early bird or a night owl, I’m a permanently exhausted pigeon.”
83. “I’m not a troublemaker, I’m just skilled at detecting loopholes.”
84. “I’m not saying I’m Batman, but have you ever seen us together in a room?”
85. “I’m not a perfectionist, I just strive for excellence in all areas of laziness.”
86. “I’m not a nerd, I’m just smarter than most people.”
87. “I’m not always late, but when I am, I make it a grand entrance.”
88. “I’m not a gossip, but I do like to observe and report.”
89. “I’m not a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that?”
90. “I’m not a morning person, don’t pull my covers off.”
91. “I’m not weird, I’m limited edition.”
92. “I’m not short, I’m fun-sized.”
93. “I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.”
94. “I’m not saying I’m Batman, but have you ever seen us in the same room together?”
95. “I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode.”
96. “I’m not clumsy, I’m just dancing with the floor.”
97. “I’m not a shopaholic, I’m just helping the economy.”
98. “I’m not saying I’m perfect, but I’m pretty close.”
99. “I’m not a troublemaker, I’m just a master of disaster.”
100. “I’m not a procrastinator; I’m just extremely productive at unimportant things.”

Funny Motivational Quotes are a great way to bring humor and inspiration into our lives. Whether you need a laugh or a boost of motivation, these quotes are sure to do the trick. So remember, life is too short to be serious all the time. Embrace the funny side of life and let these quotes brighten your day!
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